All right 2018, I've prepared a lot for you. If only you knew the shit I've been through in my life so far. But you don't -- you're brand new. You're not going to have anything to do with those traumatizing experiences, negative thoughts, or other losses and wastes of life. I shouldn't even mention them. This year, I'm going to work my ass off to be myself again. Neuroplasticity is real, and I yearn to re-shape the way I function.
As my close friends and family already know, I've decided to go abroad again -- this time with a cohort of 53 wonderful, like-minded people FOR THE WHOLE YEAR. There's many reasons to do it, and many reasons not to do it. It's not as simple as it used to be. Since my early years abroad I've been through broken heart, broken mind, and broken soul. Both personal and professional failures. But... that shouldn't scare me away, because I know that healing happens through new people, places, and experiences. Those things shape our insides in exchange for our efforts to chase after them.
So I've written this list of goals as a reminder, hopefully I can come back to it periodically and see improvement in myself:
- Become passionate about my work again so that it fills me with purpose.
- Become carefree and happy again, live with peace in my mind.
- Avoid fear and complacency, always fight for the things I desire.
- Never allow anyone abuse, manipulate, or convince me what I should be doing with my life.
- Stay positive, courageous, and strong in the face of adversary.
- Seek growth and clarity, avoid distraction.
- Seek help and guidance from everyone around me.
- Show love and appreciation of everyone around me.
Probably it's still incomplete, but it seems obvious to me -- basically just take the admirable qualities of a benevolent, successful, human being and make them mine again. Live life to the fullest and do my best to avoid the poor choices that harm and dampen my livelihood. Life is a choice until death inevitably comes, but if I'm chosing to live until that day then the only sensible approach is to live with intention and intensity 100% of every moment.